Friends?
Just a quick thought, today: what is wrong with friends?
Ok, I'll explain: life-long friend, we've know for (oh, already) 22 years (now that's a lot!) and we are very close to each other, even though sometimes we don't get to see for months, in spite of living literally five minutes away (by car...).
I don't know how to say it better than this: if she doesn't feel like going out for a drink, why can't she simply say so? Instead of making up excuses, or texting me the morning after saying she had her mobile somewhere else or was kept at work until late (which happens, mind: the Awful Winter Time is beginning for her: working time from 5.30 am to 11 pm, if she's lucky).
What I mean is, honesty? Ever heard of it? Or am I the only one who uses basic words like "Not this time, thanks" when somebody invites me oout (and that rarely happens...My refusing the invitation, that is).
It really bugs me.
It's like when somebody says "maybe next week we could go out for a drink or something" and then that "next week" never arrives.
Or I try to organise something and am continuously turned down by this one person who cannot come home for that weekend, this other who's waiting for the boyfriend to arrive, this who must study (!!!), this who is home but feels bad for not spending some time with her parents.
Boy, is it just me?
Of course I don't get out much, and I like seeing my friends as often as I can since we rarely meet apart from the couple of hours on Friday during rehearsals. And I've said it before, right after playing they all leave to meet their other friends. Unfortunately MY other friends live too far from me to just take the car and go and see them at 11 pm. And it bugs me that I should be the one who cares and wants to spend some quality time, if only to catch up with the recent news. Even if there aren't any.
Now, we (I) were trying to organise a dinner, which we do once or twice a year. When? Good question!
Halloween's week: one of us has three parties to go (ok, maybe not three, but you get the point), one is not home, one is not coming home before Friday...
The week my parents are away on holiday (bless them, a whole week of peace): they are all at university, and on the night of Saturday of that same week we have THE dinner of the band (another GREAT EVENT, but this is all in capital letters), which means that on Sunday they will all be catching up with the drinking and the non-sleeping.
So...no dinner. See you next year, then.
Personally I keep repeating that I'm sick and tired of trying to organise these things.
Then I always fall back and do my best to find a night to meet.
I crash against the same wall over and over again.
And this train of thought is only prompted by the fact that tomorrow I really wanted to go out for a quick drink before the Great Event of the Week and I bet a million euros that she will not answer my mail, or not answer my message (which I am therefore not going to send), or will find any excuse not to come, even if this means crossing the street to go to the cafè opposite her house.
Anwyay.
My treadmill is waiting for me and I've got to go.
Ok, I'll explain: life-long friend, we've know for (oh, already) 22 years (now that's a lot!) and we are very close to each other, even though sometimes we don't get to see for months, in spite of living literally five minutes away (by car...).
I don't know how to say it better than this: if she doesn't feel like going out for a drink, why can't she simply say so? Instead of making up excuses, or texting me the morning after saying she had her mobile somewhere else or was kept at work until late (which happens, mind: the Awful Winter Time is beginning for her: working time from 5.30 am to 11 pm, if she's lucky).
What I mean is, honesty? Ever heard of it? Or am I the only one who uses basic words like "Not this time, thanks" when somebody invites me oout (and that rarely happens...My refusing the invitation, that is).
It really bugs me.
It's like when somebody says "maybe next week we could go out for a drink or something" and then that "next week" never arrives.
Or I try to organise something and am continuously turned down by this one person who cannot come home for that weekend, this other who's waiting for the boyfriend to arrive, this who must study (!!!), this who is home but feels bad for not spending some time with her parents.
Boy, is it just me?
Of course I don't get out much, and I like seeing my friends as often as I can since we rarely meet apart from the couple of hours on Friday during rehearsals. And I've said it before, right after playing they all leave to meet their other friends. Unfortunately MY other friends live too far from me to just take the car and go and see them at 11 pm. And it bugs me that I should be the one who cares and wants to spend some quality time, if only to catch up with the recent news. Even if there aren't any.
Now, we (I) were trying to organise a dinner, which we do once or twice a year. When? Good question!
Halloween's week: one of us has three parties to go (ok, maybe not three, but you get the point), one is not home, one is not coming home before Friday...
The week my parents are away on holiday (bless them, a whole week of peace): they are all at university, and on the night of Saturday of that same week we have THE dinner of the band (another GREAT EVENT, but this is all in capital letters), which means that on Sunday they will all be catching up with the drinking and the non-sleeping.
So...no dinner. See you next year, then.
Personally I keep repeating that I'm sick and tired of trying to organise these things.
Then I always fall back and do my best to find a night to meet.
I crash against the same wall over and over again.
And this train of thought is only prompted by the fact that tomorrow I really wanted to go out for a quick drink before the Great Event of the Week and I bet a million euros that she will not answer my mail, or not answer my message (which I am therefore not going to send), or will find any excuse not to come, even if this means crossing the street to go to the cafè opposite her house.
Anwyay.
My treadmill is waiting for me and I've got to go.
posted by Peggy @ 5:40 PM
1 Comments:
At 10:31 PM,
Rigmor said…
Well, I can honestly say that I know what you mean. I often feel put in that situation as well. Specifically disappointing when a friend couldn't make my wedding because she was going on a "weekend break" that week end... anyway, yes. Know how you feel. And no. Don't know how to fix it.
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