When is Christmas going to arrive?
So, on my last day before the holidays…We still hope that we will be home before 6 0’clock, if only because the telephone stopped ringing three days ago…Apparently the secretary is taking the afternoon off, and me? The boss has just called to let me know that he will be here soon…thanks!
Last night I went to the gym, all dressed pretty with my favourite tartan skirt, and boots, and I did work out well, joking as it is my way, with the S&S guy more affectionate than usual; I exchanged a few glances with the B&S guy, magnetised by his eyes…we ate some sweet pastries (I had one because I was between 10 minutes on the cross-trainer and 10 on the treadmill..), and after the work out I showered quickly, got back into my smart clothes, and went to the reception. First of all I paid for the lessons of the months. Now, and how sweet is this: I was doing my last 10 minutes on the bike, to conclude, and the S&S guy came over and said “Come on sweetheart, the Christmas discount is coming”, and he let me stop 2 minutes earlier. When I was at the reception to pay he made me pay for four lessons instead of five (and we spoke low, not to be heard, so I believe it was a sort of gift for me, in his own way) (awww). He gave me my change, and then I said I had a present, and got my cd out, with this beautiful cool cover I had prepared the night before; Ex-Possible-prey arrived that very minute, and with the S&S guy and the B&S guy they looked at my creation, so I received lots of thanks, a kiss and hug from E.P.P., B&S guy asked if I had signed it, and that I should have given it to them on my arriving so we could have listened to it together, they all stared at it, I was happy to see them surprised and happy. We fixed the next appointment, then the S&S guy came to the other side of the reception to kiss me and wish me the usual for xmas, and I left…without having the chance to kiss the B&S guy as I wanted to do, because he was fixing the appointment with Newly-Found-Friend, so all he could do was looking at me, say goodbye, “hey, best wishes, Peggy”, and I just wanted to go there, hug him, and leave. But no.
Once home I went to bed after eleven, only to wake up when I heard mother being back from the dinner with her colleagues; in a state of half-insomniac consciousness, I texted a few friends, and in particular three boy friends, to implore them to come with me to bride-to-be’s wedding, tomorrow! Of course…one of the friends texted was the B&S guy…I never give up.
Now the idea is, I doubt I’ll see him before the new year. I also doubt he will text me, say, on xmas day, or on new year’s eve…I don’t intend to text him either, of course, and am well prepared to hold my will and switch off the phone in case I feel this instinct rise. I keep on thinking that I don’t even know him, and it’s only the projection of an ideal boy I have in my mind, only this time it’s got his features, his colour, his voice. So it shouldn’t be too hard to get rid of it, right? I should use these holidays to focus on something else, and detox from the thought of everything I like in him, particularly the way he smiles at me and comes over to squeeze lightly my arm before kissing me goodnight. Particularly the way his eyes shine when I look at him.
Once again, a quick plan for the days to come, before going back to work…
Let’s begin with tonight: I may run a bit, depending on the time I’ll be allowed to leave…and then I’m going to the band, if only because I hope we can go for a drink after the rehearsals, and I hope we go for a drink somewhere where I may have the slightest chance to run into the B&S guy…
Tomorrow, the wedding! Still don’t know what to wear, what to do with my hair, still afraid I’ll have to spend the whole afternoon with university friends, their boyfriends, and their tales of success and love…fab…
Sunday I intend to sleep, clean the house, run a lot…and in the evening I’ll go for the xmas carols with the band. I should go in the afternoon too, but the thought of going to retirement houses and play for those people and feel miserable for the whole time is too much for me this year. I am a bad, bad person. Xmas is a hard time for me, and seeing those old people crying when we play typical songs, holding old dolls, smiling weakly…Seriously, it breaks my heart. But maybe I’ll just find the strength and go. I’m looking forward to the night, though, even though it will be freezing cold…
And then it’s xmas, and I don’t care about anything: I am going to run, take long walks, read, watch tv and go to the cinema, see some friends (hopefully), listen to the music and relax. Sleep a real lot.
Think pink and easy.
Hapy Christmas, everybody:-)
Last night I went to the gym, all dressed pretty with my favourite tartan skirt, and boots, and I did work out well, joking as it is my way, with the S&S guy more affectionate than usual; I exchanged a few glances with the B&S guy, magnetised by his eyes…we ate some sweet pastries (I had one because I was between 10 minutes on the cross-trainer and 10 on the treadmill..), and after the work out I showered quickly, got back into my smart clothes, and went to the reception. First of all I paid for the lessons of the months. Now, and how sweet is this: I was doing my last 10 minutes on the bike, to conclude, and the S&S guy came over and said “Come on sweetheart, the Christmas discount is coming”, and he let me stop 2 minutes earlier. When I was at the reception to pay he made me pay for four lessons instead of five (and we spoke low, not to be heard, so I believe it was a sort of gift for me, in his own way) (awww). He gave me my change, and then I said I had a present, and got my cd out, with this beautiful cool cover I had prepared the night before; Ex-Possible-prey arrived that very minute, and with the S&S guy and the B&S guy they looked at my creation, so I received lots of thanks, a kiss and hug from E.P.P., B&S guy asked if I had signed it, and that I should have given it to them on my arriving so we could have listened to it together, they all stared at it, I was happy to see them surprised and happy. We fixed the next appointment, then the S&S guy came to the other side of the reception to kiss me and wish me the usual for xmas, and I left…without having the chance to kiss the B&S guy as I wanted to do, because he was fixing the appointment with Newly-Found-Friend, so all he could do was looking at me, say goodbye, “hey, best wishes, Peggy”, and I just wanted to go there, hug him, and leave. But no.
Once home I went to bed after eleven, only to wake up when I heard mother being back from the dinner with her colleagues; in a state of half-insomniac consciousness, I texted a few friends, and in particular three boy friends, to implore them to come with me to bride-to-be’s wedding, tomorrow! Of course…one of the friends texted was the B&S guy…I never give up.
Now the idea is, I doubt I’ll see him before the new year. I also doubt he will text me, say, on xmas day, or on new year’s eve…I don’t intend to text him either, of course, and am well prepared to hold my will and switch off the phone in case I feel this instinct rise. I keep on thinking that I don’t even know him, and it’s only the projection of an ideal boy I have in my mind, only this time it’s got his features, his colour, his voice. So it shouldn’t be too hard to get rid of it, right? I should use these holidays to focus on something else, and detox from the thought of everything I like in him, particularly the way he smiles at me and comes over to squeeze lightly my arm before kissing me goodnight. Particularly the way his eyes shine when I look at him.
Once again, a quick plan for the days to come, before going back to work…
Let’s begin with tonight: I may run a bit, depending on the time I’ll be allowed to leave…and then I’m going to the band, if only because I hope we can go for a drink after the rehearsals, and I hope we go for a drink somewhere where I may have the slightest chance to run into the B&S guy…
Tomorrow, the wedding! Still don’t know what to wear, what to do with my hair, still afraid I’ll have to spend the whole afternoon with university friends, their boyfriends, and their tales of success and love…fab…
Sunday I intend to sleep, clean the house, run a lot…and in the evening I’ll go for the xmas carols with the band. I should go in the afternoon too, but the thought of going to retirement houses and play for those people and feel miserable for the whole time is too much for me this year. I am a bad, bad person. Xmas is a hard time for me, and seeing those old people crying when we play typical songs, holding old dolls, smiling weakly…Seriously, it breaks my heart. But maybe I’ll just find the strength and go. I’m looking forward to the night, though, even though it will be freezing cold…
And then it’s xmas, and I don’t care about anything: I am going to run, take long walks, read, watch tv and go to the cinema, see some friends (hopefully), listen to the music and relax. Sleep a real lot.
Think pink and easy.
Hapy Christmas, everybody:-)
posted by Peggy @ 11:14 AM
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