News on the writing side (and little more)
Well…the first thing I thought of while brushing my teeth this morning was..”Damn! The meeting for the website!”. Ok, so, my memory is a colander. Or, more simply, I didn’t care about that meeting so my mind just didn’t record it and set the alarm to remind me. Never mind.
Because I was writing last night! Writing while listening to beautiful music (the cd I would like to make for David…ladies and gents, one more cd wasted…rhmph!). Writing for a whole hour and a half, which may mean nothing to you, but to me it was a productive hour and a half of trance and words. Preceded by one, and followed by two episodes of my beloved. Never felt any better.
Not that this writing is going anywhere, for the moment. I like to think that it’s some warm-up session before the great work begins. And in any case, it feels so so so good.
You know what? I just want to write. And I am so jealous of all those people who take time off work, leave their jobs, whatever, to do researches and write books. Sometimes bad books too. Depressing, that’s what it is. That I should be confined here with too much time wasted over unimportant papers and tasks, and that the fear for my eyes and the pain in my back and shoulders is so bad that spending more time writing for pleasure is too painful and I have to give up. Depressing indeed.
Once again, and again, and again: patience.
And all of a sudden, I am low. Really low. Low to the point that I spent almost a quarter of an hour crying in the bathroom. Low to the point that I feel weak and only want to go home and lie in my bed staring at the ceiling. Low to the point that I feel the need to run and run, and that will maybe make me feel better. I’ve got to wait till tonight.
(Later on...)
End of another day. I am so tired this week, and it’s only Tuesday. I have another hour before I can be at the gym, and I couldn’t resist, I have just placed a massive order for books and dvd’s…All useful stuff for my researches, though, and it’s pay-day in two weeks after all! Besides, I am not going to buy the camera, so the hundreds of euros I’ve just saved can be used (some of them) for other things. I deserve a little satisfaction, don’t I?
Because I was writing last night! Writing while listening to beautiful music (the cd I would like to make for David…ladies and gents, one more cd wasted…rhmph!). Writing for a whole hour and a half, which may mean nothing to you, but to me it was a productive hour and a half of trance and words. Preceded by one, and followed by two episodes of my beloved. Never felt any better.
Not that this writing is going anywhere, for the moment. I like to think that it’s some warm-up session before the great work begins. And in any case, it feels so so so good.
You know what? I just want to write. And I am so jealous of all those people who take time off work, leave their jobs, whatever, to do researches and write books. Sometimes bad books too. Depressing, that’s what it is. That I should be confined here with too much time wasted over unimportant papers and tasks, and that the fear for my eyes and the pain in my back and shoulders is so bad that spending more time writing for pleasure is too painful and I have to give up. Depressing indeed.
Once again, and again, and again: patience.
And all of a sudden, I am low. Really low. Low to the point that I spent almost a quarter of an hour crying in the bathroom. Low to the point that I feel weak and only want to go home and lie in my bed staring at the ceiling. Low to the point that I feel the need to run and run, and that will maybe make me feel better. I’ve got to wait till tonight.
(Later on...)
End of another day. I am so tired this week, and it’s only Tuesday. I have another hour before I can be at the gym, and I couldn’t resist, I have just placed a massive order for books and dvd’s…All useful stuff for my researches, though, and it’s pay-day in two weeks after all! Besides, I am not going to buy the camera, so the hundreds of euros I’ve just saved can be used (some of them) for other things. I deserve a little satisfaction, don’t I?
Labels: depression, the usual chaos, writing
posted by Peggy @ 11:24 AM
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